Wherein une femme seeks yogurt and balance
On our visit to France, every petit dejeuner, whether at our B&B in Aix or hotels in Paris or in a café included fresh fruit and little jars of natural yogurt. It was such a satisfying option, and a nice counterpoint to the often larger and richer meals we enjoyed the rest of the day.
This trip has really highlighted just how out of balance our own lives are, especially when it comes to food and meals. Most mornings feel so rushed, I often dash out of the house having ingested nothing but a cup of black coffee, and most days I eat lunch at my desk. Evenings we don’t do much better; from the moment I arrive home from work I’m looking after a teenager with special needs, and trying to blog, read email (work and personal), do laundry, etc. and le monsieur is often working late. So dinner, too, becomes an afterthought, something to be cobbled together usually after our son goes to bed. For people who enjoy good food and eating as much as we do, we certainly haven’t made it a priority, except on vacation!
In other ways too, our life often feels so rushed and overfull. Some of this may just be a culmination of the last several months, and adding a major home improvement project and vacation planning to the mix. But I also think that rushing through life can be an easy (bad) habit to acquire, and a tough one to break.
So this week I’ve begun re-evaluating some routines and taking some baby steps to restore a bit of the balance I crave and to take better care of myself, both nutritionally and mentally. I’m setting aside two lunch hours weekly to grocery shop for fresh foods (we have a fridge in the office where I can stash perishables for the afternoon). I’ve begun cutting up some fresh fruit for us each morning, and hunted down some plain, whole milk yogurt to top it. (No mean feat in LA, home of non-fat everything!)
A second small step is spending a little less time on the internet. No, I’m not abandoning blogging, it’s a far too satisfying part of my life to set aside! But, as much as this pains me to do so, I’m backing off on my intention to respond to every comment (which I’ve failed to do anyway for the last few weeks). I love reading your comments, and do read every one. And if you have specific questions I will respond to those, and all emails received. I’ve been a lackadaisical tweeter, and that isn’t going to change. 😉 I’m also trying to be mindful of and avoid aimless web surfing and e-window-shopping.
Life is short. What could be more important than slowing down to see, taste, smell a bit more of it?
Do you sometimes struggle to achieve balance? Does making time for self-care sometimes take a back seat to life’s other demands? Is there anything in particular that reminds you to hit the “reset” button when life gets too hectic?
~
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 United States License.
Stay in touch
Sign up to be notified of new posts and updates from une femme d’un certain âge.
I lived in Germany off and on for most of my 20s, and always despaired of finding good yogurt back in the states, to the point that I actually made my own for a while. I find the Trader Joe’s European Style to be a pretty good substitute. It has that sweet fresh milk taste, rather than the overly sour taste some natural yogurts get. Its consistency is also that of natural unstrained yogurt; it doesn’t have pectin or the other thickeners that are so hard to avoid here.
Now if I could only find sheep’s milk yogurt with sweetened chestnut puree on the bottom…
When we lived in CA, Straus was my go-to dairy provider. I bought their milk in the glass jugs and felt very country-fresh for doing it. 🙂 As I try to achieve balance in my own life, what helps most is to simplify. I have a capsule diet, if you will, and I try to include only foods I adore, can prepare easily myself and don’t cost too much money. When I eat out, which is rare, it’s a treat. But the food I eat at home, every day, makes me happy in a simple, comforting, healthy way. And for me, too, the Internet has to be limited. I think Internet use has taken over TV as a way to mindlessly consume large chunks of time. So, after my morning perusal, I shut it away (literally) and then take it out again in the afternoon. Good luck. Mama P
Would you describe your capsule diet? I’d love to hear it!
Giid yogurt is hard to find but fab when you do. I am ok at finding balance, but I agree that ‘net time can be a HUGE time waster. It’s like being in the vortex- hours can pass! As Dr Phil says if you don’t take care of yourself, you will have nothing to give to others x
I meant good not giid!! x
Fresh fruits are wonderful, but don’t forget that frozen is captured at the source, and peeled/cut-up and ready to eat. Innovative grocers have got all kinds of mixes available. You don’t have to blender them into smoothies. A handful left on the counter while you shower and prepare to depart in the morning could be a standby for you.
Love your blog, one of my favorites. Your description of a rushed lifestyle could describe the life many of us are living. In our home, we had really hit a plateau with cooking dinner and eating more healthy. I received a Groupon in my email for Fresh 20 (http://www.thefresh20.com/) and thought I’d try it out. Trust me in that I have no affiliation with this company. We love the vegetarian dishes that are offered, the shopping list and recipes are easy to navigate, and are healthy and lower in calories than what we were eating. Just wanted to share an idea for breaking out of the rut.
Thanks for all your posts, and I enjoyed traveling with you on your recent trip….someday!!!
Hi–You really should get an electric yogurt maker. Easiest thing in the world to make homemade yogurt. The countertop model is about $40 and makes 6 or 7 six-ounce individual cups. Start it in the evening, let it do its things overnight and pop the glass continers in the refrigerator the next morning. I promise it’s quick and easy! So good; no sugar or additives unless you choose to add them. After it’s chilled and as I take each cup out to eat I add my fruit. I have “no time” either, but always “make time” for this weekly chore.
sanda, thanks! Am definitely going to check into the yogurt maker.
As a European I lived and worked some time in CA. I remember very well this rushed lifestyle!!! I remember my first day at worked at lunch break: I was waiting for my colleagues to pick me up to got to lunch – as we do here. But everyone was eating at their desk. No communication, no free time, no break during the day.
Everyone was extremly busy – and the funny thing is, the didn’t accomplish more or “better” work as we do here!
Back here I have a little break in the morning, talking with my colleagues over coffee. I have a longer break for lunch, talking with my colleagues, having fun. I go back to work refreshed, ready for the afternoon. When I leave work that’s it. No more work emails in the evening. The evening is for home and family. We cook almost every evening with fresh vegetables.
And yes, I remember all the fat-free, no-calorie yoghurt 🙂 The “I can’t believe it’s not butter”…
I enjoyed my live and the experiences gained in CA. But now I am happy to be back to my slower path in Europe.
Such a thoughtful and insightful post! Finding balance is so important and your life sounds rich and full. I understand about your decision to suspend commenting on comments. I have struggled with this concept, but I have been unable to incorporate it into my blogging routine; I too love and appreciate each and every comment I decided that it was more important to read my favorite blogs and comment on posts. Finding time for self care and remaining healthy is my priority, so I can’t do everything on-line that I would like to do. I too am involved in a renovation and I want my home and garden to shine, which takes time and energy. Blogging from a place of peace and balance is my goal!
Good for you. I always miss bloggers when they reclaim parts of their lives from the Internet, but am always so glad for them that they do. Blogging is hard work in a life already filled with enough demands ….
Amities,
Marsi
Welcome back; sounds like the trip provided some much-needed space to enjoy yourselves and recalibrate!
Speaking generally, when it comes to blog content I prefer quality over quantity. I’d rather have you posting on a schedule that works for you vs feeling pressured to write — I’ll read ’em as they come!
FWIW: I know we’re coming into easy-breezy berry season, but *if* you end up feeling time-pressured, here’s another vote for frozen fruit over yogurt (or blended for an on-the-go smoothie). Toss in a dollop of local honey — or *somebody’s* local honey — for sweetness if need be.
This advice brought to you by the “Baby Steps” Coalition 😉
Here’s how you get plain, whole-milk yogurt:
1. After work, pour a bunch of whole milk into a bowl.
2. Stick it in the microwave. Heat it to about 160-180.
3. Let it cool to 115.
4. Drop a spoonful of plain Dannon or Yoplait yogurt in it. You don’t even need to stir it much. (Yogurt with live active cultures. I have found the store brands don’t work so well.)
5. Heat your oven to 200, then turn it off. Turn the oven light on.
6. Cover the bowl with a plate or a towel. Put it in the oven. Leave it there overnight.
7. When you get up in the morning, put the bowl in the fridge. Leave it alone until it’s chilled. Turn the oven light off.
8. When you get home from work, you will have whole milk yogurt. You will get to feel smug, thrifty, and self-sufficient, all at the same time, AND you will have a delicious snack.
I second the Hensberger book recommendation; she also has one for small families and uses a 1.5 quart slow cooker. You might also consider a pressure cooker; I have three, but my Kuhn-Rikon pressure *skillet* is very useful. There are a lot of good books on pressure cooking these days as well.
I love the full fat Greek yogurt by Liberte, especially the coconut flavour. A little goes a long way and I love it with fresh fruit for breakfast.
To help me get through the work week of evening meals I will usually make a large roast chicken or roast beef on a Sunday and then we have leftovers for Monday and perhaps Tuesday I’ll use any leftover meat and I will do a stir fry with lots of veggies. When I make chili or spaghetti sauce I’ll double the batch and freeze half for an evening when I am too tired to start from scratch. Fresh fish is fast and easy and I’ll often top that with salsa add a vegetable and pop some rice in the rice cooker.
I understand how quickly the internet can gobble up time as I find that I need to “walk away” from the computer!
My friend Cheryl who lives in the South of France half of the year cooks very simply always using fresh seasonal foods from the market. They linger longer over dinner than we do, it seems to be more relaxed and less rushed. It’s a habit that I would like to adopt.
Taking better care of ourselves as women with many roles in life is so important.
Hope that you have a lovely weekend!
XO
Oh yes. I miss the dinners I used to cook, before I went back to work. The simplicity of food one cooks oneself. I wish you the best with your yogurt project, and completely understand on the comment replies. I had to give them up, on the 100% basis, also due to sheer time. So do not worry – we’re all figuring this out.
I love your blog! I have been following your blog for some time now, and I am always grateful for the content- the pictures, the inclusions of other great bloggers, etc. Thank you for your company that I enjoy with my morning coffee.
This is the first time that I noticed your inclusion of having a teenager with special needs. I, too, have a son–in fact, a teenager–with special needs (Hemophilia with complications), and that makes for a rushed lifestyle. I can truly relate to your musings on the state of the typical American lifestyle as being rushed and complicated.
I am just now beginning French language courses (my daughter is tutoring me-she is a French major with plans to continue her studies in French in graduate school(next year, in fact). Thank you, again, for your blog that nurtures my love for the French culture.
Yours truly from another francophile, Martha
Hello from England. I’ve just found your blog and I’m loving it.
I agree with your comments about life, I live the same here. Rushed breakfast, lunch at my desk and not much for dinner. I am also trying to claim back my time, less internet surfing, taking more time in the evening to enjoy food and I hope to go for walks at lunch time, if only the rain would stop.
I struggle with the balance bar daily and I currently feel exhausted. I need to do some priority re-arranging this summer and make a plan for my own personal health…there is so much to do every day..it is difficult to learn to say NO, but necessary! Hopefully, we can share ideas with each other on what works and what doesn’t!! I respect your decisions to do what is best for you and your family…no matter what those decisions are…we must learn to focus on the excellent and walk away from the good in order to do that.
Someone already said it: but we make yogurt also.
One area where I’m lucky: I am a teacher and not at a high-power institution, so breaks are built in. Also, as I get to the last years of my career, I don’t have as much prep to do because my teaching repertoire has grown.
I think you are right to set aside blocks of time. I don’t know your son’s exact issues, but could you include him in the cooking? Then it would become a family activity.
I hate cooking when I get home from work, so I always have something ready. Big pots of soup are my usual solution.
Hi Frugal,
Our son has mild cerebral palsy and severe mental retardation. He’ll help with things like sprinkling shredded cheese on soup but as far as actual cooking he loses interest quickly and doesn’t have the fine motor skills to be able to do any kind of real prep work.
I’ve been tempted lately to pull out the crock pot and invest in an updated cook book. I wish our crock pot had a timer, so it wouldn’t need to be turned on mid-day.
Pseu, you can get a separate timer for your crockpot. I had one for mine and it made life really easy — cooked the food in the early part of the day and then kept it warm until dinner time. Let me know if you want my recipe for “ropa vieja”!
Another good quick and healthy dinner option is a pressure cooker. They’ve come a long way since the 1950s, and keep so many more of the nutrients in food. Well worth rediscovering.
Drive-by recommendation: Tara Duggan’s “working cook” http://www.amazon.com/The-Working-Cook-Fresh-People/dp/097608807X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1336379029&sr=8-1 Planned leftovers and good ideas for sets of meals..
Oh, I wish I lived near you! I would bring you dinners. Many crockpot recipes can be on all day–they are best for beef and pork. You could make a big pot roast or pork shoulder and eat it in various guises through the week: sandwiches, in stir fry, etc.
We mostly use the slow cooker for beans–and turn them into soups and TexMex over the week.
The most updated slow cooker book is the “Not Your Mother’s Slow Cooker…” by Beth Hensperger.
I have been too tired to do much on my blog, but I will see if I can write on this.
It sounds as if your French sojourn has got under your skin… A great post and I concur with every word. I always try and start off right but invariably my bad habits creep back in… I think that is unavoidable because our lives are so full and so busy… but as long as we continue to check ourselves from time to time to find that balance… Welcome home… xv
This column resonates with me. I was a French major and spent my junior year in Avignon (1970). While my French is utterly rusty, the thing that stayed with me most is a lifelong desire for simplicity, and an insistence on enjoying good food every day. I don’t have any magic answers for how to carve time out for it in a busy schedule but in my experience, a couple of things things helped for me:
1. Cut some things out of your life – you don’t have time to do everything.
2. Plan your food and shopping ahead – if I don’t I can make 5 or 6 stops a week and that takes too much time. I try to get several days worth at a time, starting with fish for the same day and a few other things that can hold for a day or two. I also just recently started to chop onions and herbs once a week. It saves a lot of time and those little additions to cooking make it a lot more stylish and tasty. High quality grated cheese and condiments too.
3. Cook very simply with good ingredients. Really simple cooking is wonderful and satisfying if the ingredients are very fresh and very good. Quality rotisserie chicken, grilled chops, baked fish or saucissons with some sauteed vegetables or salad is plenty. Maybe a little good bread and wine and it’s a satisfying dinner. It’s helpful if monsieur grills. Or cooks dinner now and then.
4. Good take-out (or something you can pull out of the freezer with no effort) when you are too tired to cook or just not in the mood. You can’t cook every night with such a busy schedule.
5. This one is the hardest – but – evaluate the need to give so much time to work. Although I was in management, I wouldn’t follow a career path that took over too much of my personal time. I didn’t rise as high and made less money but now I’m retired and don’t regret that choice one bit.
Good luck and enjoy every spoonful of glorious yogurt.
I understand the way you feel right now. Having just arrived home from a fabulous trip, experienced new things, on a holiday, and then arriving back home – to the ordinary routine – is suddenly often sad and boring.
You really have lots of obligations; your son, husband, work and your dogs and the home to care of. Not forgetting, that you have to take care of yourself.
You are the most important person for you. If you don´t feel well, no one will.
Yoghurt is good for you. We also eat it everyday in the morning, natural, unflavored. Our´s is a bit sour, but we are used to it.
We wake up early in the morning and plan the day´s schedule, although it seldom goes the way planned.
The early waking up, gives some time for some discussion too. Too tired for that in the evenings, when I at least retire early.
Then the TV thing. Could you stop watching it? Is it a necessity?
I have not joined the Facebook, Twitter, etc, etc,. I only have my blog, and follow a sensible amount of other blogs.
Is it necessary to have a great amount of blogs to follow? You have a lot of followers, so I guess you feel obliged to read lots of posts..
Could you radically cut the amount of blogs you comment on?
What if you started by arranging regular weekend mealtimes? Probably you already do this, so my suggestion can be ignored.
The worst thing imo is, that trying hard to change the old habits ( which are hard to change ), and not making the desired progress, might really set you down.
So, like you wrote yourself, take baby steps. Life in US is different than in the small countries of Europe. That´s just the fact.
Wishing you a peaceful Sunday!
Last study out: no breakfast means 22% more diabetes. You can argue with the exact percentage, but it’s not a good thing..
Besides, life is too short to be lived as if we didn’t have time to enjoy a good meal. Besides yogurt, some nice French cheese with crackers or bread is a fine almost-instant breakfast.
As to the blog – what are your reasons for doing it? A blog is originally a journal, responding to every comment seems so in contradiction with both the intent and the format.. If you just want to participate, join a forum, where you’re just one of many to keep things going. If not, let people read what you have time and energy to write, without pressuring yourself. Quality over quantity as someone said. Really, the world will not cave in. Try to keep it a way to express yourself, and nothing more.
xoxo for the crockpot, feels like someone cooked for you! My own route to slower life was cutting posts to 2x week, no Tweets. Online shopping actually gives me more time, but use only when I need it and with a list. Also, taking all of August off online life is a great reminder of what’s really worthwhile.
Bravo on your decision to reduce internet time. I love the internet and I love your blog, but we can’t lose balance and face-to-face time with those we love.
Kudos to you!!!
PS: And if as a result of this decision, you don’t blog as much, no problem. We will still be here and be your fans!
YES! I completely understand because I struggle with the same problem. I don’t feel like I can “cut out” anything else and yet I feel overwhelmed and under-happy (ok, I just invented that one). When I try to cut things out, I end up feeling like that one thing made the rest of my day/week better.
For example, I try to cook on weekends because I’m so tired after work on week nights. But cooking on weekends leaves me tired by Monday because I never rested. But if I don’t cook on weekends, I our weekly dinners are not satisfying or healthy because I’m too tired to cook. Ugh!!
It’s a vicious circle. If you find tricks to solve these problems, share them, because I need help too 🙂
A decade ago I was newly remarried, had a new huge commute, a demanding job and suddenly I lost all the personal time in my life. After a few desperate months, I saw a counselor who advised me to cut back and to identify activities that replenished my energy. I had many energy drains, I needed to balance it with energy enhancement.
So I did a time/energy audit for a week. I tracked my time use and also checked off each item in terms of energy drain, energy neutral and energy enhancement. It was useful and surprising. Made choices about where to cut, cut back or add a lot easier.
I love your blog but I would love it just as much if you followed la Duchesse’s sage and sain advice. Twice a week and vacances in August sounds very French.
I have the Eurocuisine yogurt maker and I love it! I reminds me so much of the European yogurt, and there are no added chemicals or flavors. It’s also convenient and very easy to use.
Yes, living with so many demands (and distractions) for one’s time can zap the day – and ourselves – away. For myself, I get lost sometimes on the internet and have to really force myself to unplug and walk away! Using a timer helps! Listing 3 or 4 top life priorities referred to often helps. Finding a convenient source for healthy food purchases helps. Seems to me you are on a the right track, as usual.
What is different about the yoghurt in France?
I haven’t ever looked for full fat yogurt, but you inspired me to check on it. Surely the health food store would have it. I am also going to check out yogurt makers. The yogurt is so expensive at the grocery and if I don’t get it eaten quickly it is tossed which is a waste of money.
Whether you blog often or not, I will still follow you. I admire you and your writing ability. Blogging takes a huge amount of time and that is something all bloggers understand. We should never put such pressure on ourselves that blogging becomes work rather than fun.
I think of yogurt as a sort of treat…but eat it at all hours of the day. Trader Joe’s may be a good place to find the whole milk yogurt. May your balance be restored…at your own pace.
Some more thoughts.. The difference between French and US yogurt isn’t just the full fat, it’s a different strain of bacteria. The same Danone yogurt in California is sour, sadly. It used to be that you could mail-order French bacteria. Make a peep when you have a yogurt maker in hand, I’ll try to find it meanwhile.
Also, to me the difference in French and CA life isn’t so much more free time or less things to do (French women take the booby prize for doing everything for everyone). But the real difference is in -unscheduled- time. You know, being able to goof off for an afternoon or an hour without looking at a todo list, spending open time with family or friends where you’re just hanging out, talking or taking a walk or something idle. So many of my CA have their lives scheduled down to 20mn intervals for weeks ahead. That makes me crazy :-). I’d rather miss something, or do nothing, than to feel a prisoner of my own life.
I love that brand of yogurt and I thought Faux Fuchsia’s “Giid” was a new word :).
Balance is so important. I know that feeling of rushing through life and it’s definitely not good.