Bad Boys: They charmed their way into our wardrobes, but sister, they done us wrong.
The Cheap S.O.B.*
This one woos with promises of romantic weekend getaways and brunches at The Ritz, but never seems to get past the game on TV and the Grand Slam breakfast at Denny’s. This relationship begins to fray around the edges almost immediately, and will inevitably fall apart within a few weeks.
*h/t to Patti at Not Dead Yet Style for the reminder about this BB.
His idea of a romantic weekend getaway involves strapping on a 70 pound backpack and hiking 8 miles a day, mostly uphill and above timberline. His unspoken motto seems to be, “if it’s not an ordeal, we’re not having fun.” The only ones eating well are the mosquitos. By the end of the second day all you can think about is being able to wash your hair again. And a very chilled martini.
|“My friends call me Jimmy.” Source|
A master of seduction, he makes you feel so sexy and desirable. It’s all passion and glamour and Cristal in the VIP section at the start; the pain comes later. This handsome cad will skip out on the tab halfway through the evening, leaving you broke and limping home down the Boulevard of Broken Dreams.
Walk of Shame
How does that old country song go, “the girls all get prettier around closing time”? Desperation rarely leads to lasting romance, and this was no different. Somehow you knew it would never be anything more than a one-night stand, but still you needed….something. (For a wedding, a party, a class reunion.) Or maybe it was Last Call at the Ole Sales Rack, and you were determined not to go home empty handed. But in the cold light of morning, as queasy waves of Regret wash over you, you quickly banish the sordid reminder to the darkest corner of the closet and hope that somehow it will just disappear from mind as well as sight.
How are you doing with ferreting out and sending your Bad Boys packing?
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