It all started with the Talbot’s fall lookbook. Now don’t get me wrong, there are some very covetable pieces in there and I love some of the looks and how they’ve styled everything, but when I first viewed it, the primary and overwhelming thought that it generated was “I’ll need to lose weight to look good in those clothes.” As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve lived with the constant background noise of “want to be thinner” (regardless of my actual weight) for most of my life, and at times am able to tune it out. The last few weeks have not been one of those times. As I’ve aged and my body has softened a bit more, I’ve come to realize that the more structured, boxy pieces that I love so much conceptually really don’t look good on me anymore (if they ever did). What do look good are softer, longer pieces with some flow and drape, that skim my curves and don’t add volume. Tailored pants suits, which used to be my staple, now feel mannish and otherwise too formal for my workplace. I’m just not feeling the blazer jackets either these days, even worn with jeans. What I’ve been gravitating toward, and what’s looking and feeling best these days is a more “long over lean” silhouette.
But moving to softer pieces seems to fire up the Greek chorus in my head, “you’re Giving UP!” On the other hand, is it really giving up to dress to flatter the body we have *now* as long as we’re choosing items that appeal to us and that fit our budget and lifestyle? Am I feeling pressure to measure up to someone else’s style standards? If I could give up the fear of negative judgement, what would I want to wear? If I can put together a wardrobe of softer, Paris-worthy pieces, why do I still pine for those styles that no longer work for me short of never eating another carb and doing Pilates for three hours a day?
What about you? Do you sometimes have trouble reconciling how your head wants to dress vs. what’s best on your body? Or have you made peace?
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